柜中女同 Closeted Lesbian

柜中女同

Closeted Lesbian

导演|李碧

编剧|李碧

主演| 无

制片人|李碧

摄影|无

类型|纪录片、实验片、短片

时长|6分钟16秒

完成时间|2020

对白语言|无

字幕|英语

地区|巴西,圣保罗

制片公司|无

故事梗概

这是一个迟来的道歉,迟来的一封情书,和一个迟到的告别。

导演介绍

Bia Lee是一名24岁的巴西韩裔业余电影制作人/视频艺术家,也是在巴西圣保罗的全日制心理学学生。她/他们主要制作(或者可以说摆弄)一些实验性、情欲性和纪录片性质比较强的作品,如《食指》(2015)、《融化》(2016)、《她的POV》(2016)和《未出柜的女同性恋》(2020),这些作品都在国内外的电影节上展出(例如立陶宛的Kreivės/维尔纽斯酷儿节,西班牙的马德里国际录像艺术节,加拿大的蒙特利尔地下电影节)。

《未出柜的女同性恋》则被选至美国波士顿Wicked Queer LGBTQ+电影节、爱尔兰GAZE国际LGBTQ+电影节 、美国戴维斯女权主义电影节、瑞士Porny Days电影艺术节、奥地利维也纳色情电影节等。

这是她的作品第一次被亚洲地区接受,没有什么能比这让她更高兴的了。

导演阐述

这部短片是我对童年好友的小小致敬。她本人并不知情,但她是我性取向的重要组成部分,从最一开始就无意识地建立了起来。几年前,她突然出现在我的梦中,那时我已经很久没有见过她、想过她、或者想着她自慰过了。当我醒来时,我在网上搜了她的名字,想查一下她此刻的情况。我发现她早在2014年就自杀了。那年我们17岁。这着实让我震惊了很长一段时间。我感到内疚和后悔。

她可能认为她和我一样是双性恋。但在很久以前,像我们这样的愚蠢小孩无谓的复制着父母和社会中的恐同时,我偶尔对她很糟糕。我利用她一部分性取向作为冒犯,向她投射了实际上也是我自身的东西——正如我所说,我甚至会想着她自慰。关于她的自杀,我希望这事儿发生在了我身上。我以为这应该是我。有时我觉得我们换掉了彼此的人生。

这部电影是一种详述了我的性取向以及内疚、死亡和哀悼的方式。这是一个迟到的道歉,一封迟到的情书,也是一个迟到的再见。来自我,送给一个过着短暂但出了柜的美好女孩。

Director|Bia Lee

Screenwriter|Bia Lee

Cast|None

Producer|Bia lee

Cinematographer|None

Genre|Documentary, Experimental, Short Film

Length|6min16s

Year|2020

Dialogue|No Dialogue

Subtitles|English

Region|São Paulo, Brazil

Production Company|None

Synopsis

This is a late apology, a late love-letter, and a late goodbye.

Director Biography

Bia Lee is a 24 years old Korean brazilian amateur filmmaker and video-artist, also a full-time psychology major student based in São Paulo, Brazil. She/they works (plays) mostly with experimental, erotic and documentary stuff, as seen in Forefinger (2015), To Melt (2016), Her POV (2016) and Closeted Lesbian (2020), that were shown in film festivals in Brazil and abroad (e.g. Kreivės / Vilnius Queer Festival – Lithuania, International Videoart Festival Madrid – Spain, and Montreal Underground Film Festival – Canada).

Closeted Lesbian, specifically, was selected to festivals like Wicked Queer: The Boston LGBTQ+ Film Festival – US, GAZE International LGBTQ+ Film Festival – Ireland, Davis Feminist Film Festival – US, Porny Days Film Art Festival – Switzerland, Porn Film Festival Vienna – Austria, and more.

This is the first time her work was accepted in Asian – and she couldn’t be happier.

Director’s Statement

This short film is a small tribute to a childhood friend. She doesn’t know, but she was an important part of my sexuality, which is unconsciously built from the very beginning. A few years ago, a long time since the last time that I saw her or thinking about her or masturbating with her in my mind , she appeared in my dream. When I woke up, I searched her name on the internet to see how she was, only to found out that she committed suicide years earlier in 2014 when we were both 17 years old. I was in real shock for a while. I felt guilty and regretful.

She probably considered herself bisexual like me, but long before, when we were foolish children reproducing homophobia from our parents and society, I was bad to her at times. I took part of her sexuality as an offense, projecting on her something that is actually also mine – as I said, I even masturbated while thinking about her. About the suicide- I wished it had been me. I thought it should have been me. Sometimes I feel that we switched lives.

This film was a way to elaborate a little on my sexuality and also on guilt, death, and lamentation. It is a late apology, a late love-letter, and a late goodbye. From me, to a wonderful girl who lived a short but uncloseted time.

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